By Cathy Burns
Master Facilitator for The Virtues Project

​I recently attended an online webinar based on the book “A Pace of Grace: The Virtues of a Sustainable Life” by Linda Kavelin-Popov. A sustainable life is about doing more of what I choose to do and less of what drains me. It means taking the time out each day to recharge and keeping self-care at the top of my priority list, not the bottom. Sustainability is about moderation and focusing on your passion. Here are 5 of the strategies I’ve found the most helpful.
 
Meditate
Even brief meditation has been shown to reduce  fatigue, improve working memory and executive function. Too busy to meditate? How about mediating in the shower? Savor the feeling of the water cleansing your body and spirit. You can even meditate while driving – with your eyes open! Focus on breathing in and breathing out. When a thought comes, acknowledge it and return to your breath. This type of mindfulness mediation has been shown to reduce anxiety. 

Connect with Friends
According to researcher Emma Seppala, strong social  connections improve mental health, boost the immune system and may even help you live longer. Connecting with friends is more than sending a text or “liking” their Facebook status. It means real connection. Got 5 minutes? Call up and say “Hey, I only have a few minutes, but I was thinking of you and just wanted to touch base.” Ask them how they are and really listen. Schedule face time too. Meet for coffee or setup a lunch date (you gotta eat).
 
Play
What gives you joy? What brings meaning to your life? These are just a few of the questions from “Plan a Sustainable Life,” a handout from my POG Webinar. Until I thought about it, I realized I hadn’t done anything “just for fun” for months! So I schedule a board game night with the gals (hey, it’s my idea of fun) and laughed for hours with them! Bonus: This satisfied both Play and Connecting with Friends. (Here is the handout for "Plan a Sustainable Life."
 
Create a Sacred Space
For many of those who live in my home state of Florida, this is paradise. Just going outside is being in a sacred space. Not so for me. I don’t dig the tropical climate, the palm trees and sandy beaches. I long for cool weather in the 50’s, beautiful tall trees and forest paths. So I created a sacred space in my home office. It’s where I meditate, work, and sometimes daydream. I keep live plants in my office, as even a glimpse of nature is enough to have a positive impact on health and life satisfaction. Whether a place in nature or a corner of your room, find or create a space that soothes and nourishes your spirit.

By Linda Kavelin-Popov

In A Scent of Sage, my debut novel, I quoted Peace Pilgrim, a woman who walked across America for the cause of peace, with nothing but a travel apron and good shoes. She said, "If we knew how powerful our thoughts were, we would never again have another negative thought." Her message has never been needed more.

Waves of despair threaten to engulf us day after day, as we watch the violence, killing, and hatred, even in the name of religion. The headline for a recent New York Times column was: "Make America Hate Again." It's enough to threaten anyone's peace, even in a South Pacific paradise. It would be so easy to drown in powerlessness. Yet, many of us wonder, what can I do about it? The heart of the world seems to be breaking, but perhaps it is breaking open.
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As author Steven Covey says, "Between the stimulus and the response, there is always choice." Our primitive urge to retaliate -- to wipe the bad guys off the face of the earth -- can be transformed into resolve. Besides, as cartoon figure Pogo says, "We have met the enemy, and they are us."

By Jessica Scott

“There is no way to Peace -- Peace IS the way” ~ Ghandi
 
This is possibly the most difficult topic to write about when emotions are high and the pain is raw. The tragic events of Orlando, the loss of 49 human lives listed here http://www.cityoforlando.net/blog/victims/ , of Philando Castile, Alton Sterling and the 5 police officers in Dallas, and the young singer, Christina Gimmie,  is a devastating blow to humanity and the fundamental values of being human: happiness, love and life itself. We support and send love to our fellow brothers and sisters with our deepest condolences for all affected by these tragedies in Orlando.
 
By writing this piece, I seek not to change the world or people – I simply seek a deeper understanding of that which I have no control over and how others react to any given situation. I am writing this piece to dig deeper within myself – to find peace in the wake of this tragedy and acceptance of what is beyond my control. How can anyone make sense of the insensible? In times of conflict, I find there are several virtues that help me to gain strength and insight. The following virtues call to me to create within me and with others unity, peace, tolerance, acceptance, compassion and love. 

by Nicole Slaughter-Graham

I used to think assertiveness was a negative trait. I struggled with voicing my opinion in a manner that was both true to me and respectful to others, because I wanted to be liked. What I didn’t realize was my inability to assert my truth negatively affected my relationships and my personal serenity. The Virtues Project definition of Assertiveness really made clear the importance of this specific trait:

By Linda Kavelin-Popov. Reprinted with permission

When I did a Virtues Pick for 2016, I received Determination. This virtue is all about discerning the path we want to take, the one we feel led to take, then setting goals, and achieving them, step by step. It often begins with a vision. Proverbs 29:18 says, "Where there is no vision, the people perish." In the children's book, Alice in Wonderland, Alice is lost, and asks the Cheshire Cat which path to take. The cat wisely says, "If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there."
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Here are some steps to take when practicing the virtue of Determination.

1. The first and perhaps most important step is to decide what you want to do, or where you want to go with your life and energy. Set your intention. What goal is worthy of great effort? It doesn't have to be a big goal, just one that matters to you. It could be a personal goal such as quitting smoking, or turning an unhappy relationship into a happy one, solving a problem in our lives, or overcoming a financial challenge.
   
   
2. For me, it begins with prayer and meditation. As Albert Einstein, the great physicist said, "I want to know God's thoughts. The rest are details." Aligning our vision with God's will for us is true spiritual efficiency.
   
   
3. After you choose a goal, create a clear picture of it. Use the full power of your mind to imagine the goal being accomplished. Some people make a "vision board" with images that represent what they are aiming for.
   
   
4.  Make a plan, with the steps you will take to achieve your goal.
   
   
5. Take each step with discipline, trust and faith, and finish what you start.
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6. When you achieve your goal, pause for applause! Celebrate your achievement and give thanks for the help you have received along the way.

By Nicole Graham-Slaughter

The above stated question comes straight from The Virtues Project™ deck of cards, and it references the Virtue of Devotion. Lately, I’ve been inspired by many different forms of devotion I’ve been blessed to witness, and I’d like to take a look at a few examples.
 
A beautiful woman that I know and respect has an incredible voice—the kind that arouses a deep misty-eyed emotional response. For a long time, though she knew singing was her calling, she faltered because of self-doubt. Her devotion to her craft wavered. 

​But in the past year, her growth has been immeasurable. She let go of that which held her back and renewed her devotion to her incredible talent. She walked through fear and pursued her passion. Her calling—singing—called within her in a way that she could not resist. Now, her career is flourishing. She’s been blessed time and again with another venue to share her gift, and I can attest to the fact that the world is a better place because of her gift. 

By Linda Kavelin-Popov. Reposted with permission from ​http://gracefulendings.net/blog/

By ​Nicole Slaughter-Graham

​​I’ve been reading Dr. Brene Brown’s Daring Greatly, and I can’t help but think of the parallels between the book’s main focus—vulnerability—and the virtue of Openness.
 
Dr. Brown’s book centers on the importance of vulnerability and how we as a society need to embrace vulnerability as an asset rather than a short-coming. She describes vulnerability as the stripping away of ego so that one can show his or her true self to the world. She states that the ability to be vulnerable—to make mistakes, speak our truth, and listen with an open mind—are necessary to connect with others, and connection with others is of the utmost importance for humankind.

Her philosophy mirrors the virtue of Openness. This particular virtue requires “being honest, clear and sincere, and sharing who we are and what we feel without pretense."

By Nicole Graham-Slaughter

NPR recently reported that we are less empathetic when we’ve been through the same situation as someone else. So wait… what does this mean? According to NPR, if someone comes to you needing sympathy because they’re struggling with the burden of being a single parent, but you too, are a single parent, then you might not have as much empathy as someone who isn’t a single parent.
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When I first heard this, I thought there was no way it was true. Surely, someone who’s been through the same situation as another person would have more empathy right? They know where that person is coming from. They can identify with the feelings and burdens that situation entails, right? Apparently not. According to NPR’s social science correspondent, Shankar Vedantam, a person who has been through the same predicament you have is going to show less empathy because he or she deals with that same problem on a daily basis. It’s actually better to reach out to someone who hasn’t experienced your hardship if you want to receive empathy.