By Nicole Graham-Slaughter

NPR recently reported that we are less empathetic when we’ve been through the same situation as someone else. So wait… what does this mean? According to NPR, if someone comes to you needing sympathy because they’re struggling with the burden of being a single parent, but you too, are a single parent, then you might not have as much empathy as someone who isn’t a single parent.
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When I first heard this, I thought there was no way it was true. Surely, someone who’s been through the same situation as another person would have more empathy right? They know where that person is coming from. They can identify with the feelings and burdens that situation entails, right? Apparently not. According to NPR’s social science correspondent, Shankar Vedantam, a person who has been through the same predicament you have is going to show less empathy because he or she deals with that same problem on a daily basis. It’s actually better to reach out to someone who hasn’t experienced your hardship if you want to receive empathy. 

By Nicole Graham-Slaughter, freelance writer and journalist.

About a week ago, I found myself at my desk doing anything but my job. Though I had projects to start (and projects to finish) and deadlines to hit, I couldn’t seem to muster up the discipline to get things done. I was surfing Facebook, allowing myself to get distracted by interesting headlines and useless quizzes.
 
Subconsciously, I’d pulled my old procrastination habit out of the closet for another go. Deadlines started creeping up or my manager would ask me about my progress o a specific project, and I’d scramble to accumulate information and put haphazard finishing touches on assignments.
 
And then I was sent to a conference for work. One of the first sessions was on office etiquette and how to win over customers. Though not directly related to customer service, a point the presenter made resonated with me to the core. She said, “Under promise, and over deliver. If you say you’ll have something to someone by Wednesday, get it to them on Tuesday at the latest.”
 
Simple. And yet so powerful.